A kitchen table is where the heart of the family is and ours was no exception. My parents told me stories of late nights sitting up playing cards around that table and laughing until it hurt. I can remember as a child sitting there while my Grandma was in the kitchen (I swear she lived in there) watching her cook and talking with her.
While some families may say "everything happens around the kitchen table" that was very true in the Leitnaker family. This particular table was my Grandpa's parents and now sits in my sister's house. It's nothing fancy but it holds so many memories. I can only imagine the laughter, tears and memories that have been made around it.
We lost my Grandma today. 4 weeks to the day that my Grandpa passed away. Like many women, my Grandma was the heart of the family. She was what kept us all together for so many years. She taught all of us girls how to cook, sew and be a mom. She taught her sons and grandsons how to treat their wives and daughters. And most importantly she taught us about the love of family.
I have written before about the how strong of a bond our family has and I can honestly say that I give all that credit to her. Thanksgiving, Christmas, summer breaks were all spent at her house. 16 of us would cram into their tiny 3 bedroom home. Somehow we made it work and I wouldn't trade those memories for anything.
But the kitchen is where I most remember my Grandma. No matter how hard they struggled she always put dinner on the table. Dinner was the heart of the family and we all knew that. No one could cook like my Grandma. No one could make fried chicken like her.... well except MAYBE her sister, Betsy... but I will let them figure that one out!
Grandma would spend endless hours in the kitchen and she always sampled as she ate. All good cooks know that you don't follow a recipe, you learn from tasting. That is something I learned from her. I can remember her making sure all of us were fed before she ever got a plate and when she did finally eat it was barely anything. She would always say she ate it all while she cooked!
My Grandma was diagnosed with Alzheimer's over 10 years ago. I can remember the devastation that came when her sons realized it was time for them to leave their house. My Grandma was the caretaker, she made the meals and took care of Grandpa. And since she wasn't able to anymore it was time for them to move.
That weekend was so hard. My Grandpa sat at the kitchen table most of the day, angry that he had to lose his home. But I honestly believe it was more than that. He had lost his wife to a horrible disease. No longer would they sit around that table and have their family come over. No longer would they enjoy a bowl of ice cream after EACH meal- at least not ice cream that he picked from his deep freeze.
Losing a loved one to Alzheimer's is one of the hardest things I have ever seen. Yet, somehow through it all Grandma remained Grandma. She survived longer than most do and I truly believe that it was so she could continue to be the care taker of my Grandpa and her children. Even if she couldn't do that physically and mentally she was still there as someone that loved them and cared for them.
My Grandpa passed 4 weeks ago and since then Grandma started to decline. I believe that my dad and Grandpa called her home today. She was finally able to let go so that she could take care of them eternally.
My Grandma was an amazing woman. Last night I was able to go see her with my mom and sister. We prayed, sang Amazing Grace and laughed. We knew that she was there. We knew that she was with us. I leaned over to her at one point and said "Just go, just go. Your baby and Grandpa are waiting for you. We are OK."
I believe her journey was beautiful and I believe it was peaceful. And I believe with my whole heart that she is now with my dad, my Grandpa and her sister sitting around the kitchen table eating fried chicken and laughing.
"Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all" -Proverbs 31: 28-29
Bless you, Grandma. May you always know how much you taught me about love, life and the importance of a kitchen table.
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